Baywatch Interrogation

What is the world coming to when political figures try to tell us that torture was okay because it was “legal”? I don’t care what you call it; it’s still wrong.

What we need is a paradigm shift. When you detain people and then treat them badly, they don’t necessarily talk.

What would work, however, is if the interrogator spoke the native tongue of the detainee, found out what their childhood was like, how they grew up, what matters to them, how they came to do what they did and why? But that’s not enough. There has to be some kind of motivation to get people to talk (besides wanting their freedom again).

What if the interrogator brought in a Baywatch babe, dressed in a turtleneck and she just sat there, occasionally smiling at the detainee? And then, when he gives us a little information, everyone goes back home and checks it out.

If the info checks out, the interrogator returns, but this time, the Baywatch babe is dressed a little more spicy.

And if the next bit of info is good, they return and she keeps lowering her necklines.

If I know one thing about men, it’s this: they’re pretty simple. Why else would a suicide bomber do his kamikazee job? Because he’s trying to get to the virgins! Nobody bothered to tell him that none of the virgins put out! Why do you think they call them virgins?

I digress.

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